Lucky Kids

We shared a look, Sara and I. The kids were nattering away, having Santa hat drawing competitions on the pvc tablecloth bought especially for that purpose. They’d already made a mess of the anti-pasto type Christmas lunch, and as they ignored Vivaldi’s “Gloria” playing in the background, they leapt onto their second bottle of Bundaberg’s finest ginger beer. As they guzzled and giggled, we shared a look because we know we are lucky kids.

Sara, kids and chair



Oli, out squatting in his (in torrential rain)

Kimmy, oustanding in her field

 

Ivy at Raspberry Hill lookout

We have been on the road for 365 days. Tomorrow will mark a year since we hooked up Kimmy for the first time and made the torturous journey down to Barwon Heads from Melbourne. An hour and a half of pure terror. I’ll never forget the look of relief on Sara’s face when she saw Sal there to greet her with a glass of wine, and Jacko met me with advice and common sense. So long ago.

 

3 little reindeer

At that time we had planned to be home for Christmas. It was an Anderson Christmas this year, so the call to Mum to tell her we wouldn’t be back in time wasn’t easy. Instead, we are on the banks of the Mann River, 70 kilometres west of Grafton, staying on some blokes’ farm. Incredibly, this farm is not far from the property that was settled by Mum’s family back in the 1800’s. The property where my Grandmother was born. Funny how things work out. It’s conceivable that I could have still lived there. Unlikely given my complete lack of farm skills, but conceivable. Ramornie is no longer in my family, but I am drawn to this country.

 

Getting ready for a feast

The debate once we were certain we were not coming home was where Christmas should be. Cousins, Aunts, and friends all asked us to stay but we decided that it should just be us. Beach or bush? Caravan park or national park? In the end, Rorys’ offer of his mates’ farm was perfect. A friendly river at the bottom of the hill, lush green hills in the distance, and a flat, accessible caravan friendly site with only the occasional happy cowboy churning past in a Toyota ute for company. The boys elected to set up the tents they found by the
bins in Yamba; Sara, Ivy and I were in the van.

 

Santa sacks

Christmas morning and not too early a start. Santa had managed to find us, spilt his milk, probably in disgust, while the reindeer made a mess of their carrots as per usual. Pressie highlights were a sundress for Ivy, lollies for Ned, old Nat Geos for Oli, and a new camp throne with chiller box that can hold up to 130kgs for Sara. Two of her could sit in it! Pancakes followed pressies, and adventure followed pancakes!

 

 

The fantastic four arrive home safe...and late

Sara dropped us off about 6 -8 k’s upstream with a canoe and two tyres. Several mini-rapids were negotiated without incident but a lot of laughter, at least until Ned bruised his bum. Panic only set in when we realised we were going to miss the return deadline we had set with Sara. The thought of her sitting on the bank, torn between looking at her watch, and looking for us through the binoculars put an end to a leisurely float. We powered down the river, towing Oli in his tyre, going backwards down the final set of rapids not because it was more fun, but because I had completely lost control of the canoe by that point. It was more fun though. Two and a half hours after saying goodbye to Sara, we saw her again just as it began to rain and just before she asked the happy cowboy for help. Home safe to Kimmy and our Christmas lunch. Sara and I shared a look and had a sip. We are lucky kids. Merry Christmas and thank you to my family for this special year.

 

H

Boundary Creek Falls

Just One of the Crowd

Ned at the Big (tired) Pineapple

In 1988, two mates of mine, Shane and David gave me the unfortunate nickname of "Petrol" when they needed financial assistance on a roadtrip to Surfers Paradise. It has been 24 years since then, and if I'm there within another 24, it'll be too soon. Oh the horror of all that concrete and prefabricated glitz. But I was back because we were staying in Brisbane, and when I stay in Brisbane, there is nothing I like better than to drive for an hour to get to a theme park so that I can stand in line with people with regrettable tattoos and loud voices.
















Boys and chooks

We stayed with cousin Sam and her partner Mark, dogs Dom and Moe`, blind Geoffrey the pigeon, 4 chooks, and 2 cockateels. Not sure where the time went, but there was plenty of Chrissie shopping, and 4 trips down the highway for theme parks and a forgettable time share briefing. Ned and I returned to Cooloola Cove to pick up Kimmy, and made sure we ticked off some big things and Hungry Jacks on the way.

Ned and crab, plenty more on ice!

The theme parks were fun, but so crowded that it wasn't unusual to wait 45 minutes in line for a 2 minute ride. "Wet and Wild" was particularly bad, with dozens of school groups "Oh my Godding" all over the place. Still, the kids had a ball, as did we once we were out of the queue. Sara did well, tearing herself from her book to brave a couple of rides including one roller coaster! Oli ticked everything off including a 53 metre bungee swing with me. Why I let him have control of the rip cord I'll never know. Mohammed went on that ride before us. His pregnant wife wasn't able to do anything in the park, but was insistent that he did so that he would get over his fear of heights before the birth of his son. Poor, sweaty, jiggly, chatty Mohammed was just hoping he'd get to meet the boy! Immersion theory at it's finest.

Cute contest, Dom the wimpy mutt vs Pip the kelpie

A girl and her pony (horse) called Honeybuzz, of course!

We left Brisbane with an esky full of blue swimmer (sand) crabs, having helped Mark haul in his crab pots the day before. The next stop was Toowoomba and Angus and Bidge McDowall's farm. Whilst this visit was never part of our original plans, it was lovely. I had a taste of farm life growing up, but the kids haven't had  joy of watching a sheep dog do it's job. Angus breeds kelpies. The kids fed the puppies, rode in the ute, rode a horse bareback, did farm chores, and almost got to see how foals are made. All in all a very exciting couple of days.

Lamington National Park

We then took the most direct route into Lamington National Park, but were told on arrival that Kimmy was too big. We drove back down the too curly and too steep mountain and into Nerang, setting up in a caravan park that was chock a block with permanent residents and was easilly the most depressing and poverty stricken park we have stayed in. Everyone seemed to have some sort of affliction or disability. Even the park manager was in a coma, but that wasn't funny because it was true. We went hiking in the park the next day and had a long walk, made slow because the kids were spotting wildlife everywhere. Home for a bbq, DVD's for the kids and "Skyfall" at the Nerang cinema across the road for Sara and me. So ended a world class day!

Western (almost), Northern, Eastern: tick!

Almost a decade ago, friends from Melbourne, Phil and Nikki left on a trip like ours with their 4 kids. Van first, then boat. On returning to Melbourne, they packed up and left to live in Mullumbimby outside of Byron Bay. They now live on the top floor of a former convent complete with a confessional, and a statue of Mary in the garden. It was fascinating comparing journies, as well as seeing their kids for the first time in ages. They almost convinced us to stay on for Christmas, there certainly is something addictive in the area, and it wasn't just Phil's hugs.

Fireworks at Brunswick Heads

I'm not talking about Nimbin, that was pretty sad really. Kind of like an evil Disneyland throw back to the sixties. However the hinterland country side is lush and inviting, the Japanese cafe in Federal was a surprise, and the fish tacos in Byron almost demmand you hang around permanently. The beach at Byron was everything I'd heard about, with Hamish friendly surf on tap even if the Pass wasn't working perfectly. But the crowds were massive. Traffic everywhere, and a busy shopping centre that made Sorrento in mid-summer seem quiet. Wish I'd gone to Byron 24 years ago instead of Surfer's; it's certainly not what it apparently was.

Christmas is rapidly approaching, with only 4 days to go as I write. Thanks to Rory McDowall who was over for dinner last night, we look like we'll be camping by the Clarence river on the day. A quiet, family Christmas, just us, cheese, ham, pudding, ginger beer and wine. Perfect. Speak to you then.

H

Searching for a Real Man

Kids at the Maheno wreck

I would never be considered to be a poster boy for the alpha male set. Skinny and bookish me. Whilst I am resigned to my lot, I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel a little inadequate at times. Still, no man likes to have their own perceived masculine inadequacies rubbed in. However, just before I lined the Disco up for a third crack at the sand dune leading up to Indian Head on Fraser Island, I asked my ever supportive spouse if she was nervous. “Well” muttered she, “I wouldn’t be if you were Bill Fry.”

Alpha male food; Spam, Deb mashed potato,
rehydrated peas and carrots, YUM

Now Bill Fry is one of my brother in laws, and I consider him a good mate. He is without question an alpha male. But Sara wasn’t sitting beside Bill, she was sitting beside Hamish, and crikey, didn’t Hamish give the Disco some curry after that! Summited without a problem, and drove hard from then on. Got mildly bogged once. When Bill was on Fraser, he got bogged so badly he came within 15 minutes of losing his Landrover to the tide. But of course, that's a small detail Sara had decided to overlook! We spent 4 days on Fraser, and did a lot of driving. Camped on the beach and in the forest. Watched backpackers cavorting in the shallows of Lake Mackenzie and dodged dingos on the beach whilst trying to text friends at a Christmas dinner in Melbourne. Ned and I did a great hike up to Basin Lake, and I finally came through on my promise to cook old fashioned camping food, ie Spam and Deb and dried peas with canned plum pudding and custard for dessert! The boys loved it, Sara had tofu. Despite the fun and games, we won't be back though unless we develop a desire to fish and 4WD with passion.
 

Sandblow

Before we'd left for Fraser, the van had got itself caught on the Disco's over engineered towball hitch, destroyed that and fallen off the back of the disco in the caravan park. The park manager and his tractor saw us right, then suggested that Wayne of "Rainbow Wreckers" might be the person to speak to regarding fixing the twisted hitch. Wayne is an alpha male of a different sort. Short, with thinning hair and questionable dental hygiene, he is a wizard with all things mechanical. Wayne has at various times in his life created a 4WD Rolls Royce, a 6WD Cadillac, a hovercraft / fan boat among other bizarre crafts. He also has the Fraser Island transport contract which makes him a very wealthy man.
 

Wayne must have seen something in me, something in my desperation, that made his alpha tendencies go a bit beta. "I can fix that" he pronounced and took the hitch off my hands. Less than a day later, we'd managed to fit it into the Disco again, caravan ready. All for the cost of a case of XXXXGold. In the meantime, the electronic latch on the rear door failed. We left for Fraser anyway, but bumped into Wayne while de-salting the car after Fraser. "Did you fix the back door?" he demanded; "I can do it at 3:30 after I drop this load of cement off". He fixed the door latch, we hitched the van up, and left Rainbow Beach late on Tuesday evening. That's when Wayne's reputation got sullied.




Ivy running into Lake Wabby

The road out of Rainbow Beach is hilly and twisty. At 90kph, coming down one of the hills, Wayne's handiwork came undone and the hitch fell out of the car again, dropping the caravan onto the highway held only by the safety chains. A thump, sparks, and the screaming of metal. The road was straight and I was able to slow down gradually to a stop. If we'd been going around a corner, things would have been horribly different and the inertia of the van would have dictated where we ended up. Have been trying not to think about that.

Landrover hitch after being dragged for 100m's. Quality steel at least!

On the side of the highway, Sara corralled the kids whilst calling for help on a phone with a failing battery. Cars raced by in the darkness, then one stopped. Chris and Lyn stepped out of their Landrover and walked across the road to survey the situation. We got the van jacked up, and reconnected the hitch, and then decided not to use it. Wise. Instead, Chris and Lyn towed us back to their house, parked the van in the yard next door, made sure we had everything we needed, and left to go fishing, again. An alpha male and a good Samaritan in one neat package.




Backsons and Irwins

Still shell shocked the next morning, we said good bye to Chris, Lyn and Kimmy, and headed down the road towards Brisbane and the Australia Zoo. Was Steve Irwin an alpha male? You'd be hard pressed to argue that a bloke who could wrestle crocs, catch snakes, surf, live in pretty forbidding country and establish a multi-million dollar business wasn't. So in keeping with the theme of the past week, we dropped into his zoo to pay our respects, and I got all teary.

Alpha males in training

Australia Zoo is a massive operation. Clean as a whistle and co-ordinated to a fault. Not much in the way of animals we hadn't seen, but some nice shows, and plenty of room. Poor dead Steve is all over the place. Grinning from every available vantage point, he's screaming "crikey" from every screen and every sign. The problem though, is that because this particular alpha male jumped on the back of a sting ray, he's no longer here, and I can't help feeling that because of that, the Irwin empire is running out of time no matter how many crop tops Bindi sells. For as much as he made me cringe, I could never fault his ethics and his desire to improve our world. I miss you Steve, and if tearing up as I admit that disqualifies me from alpha status, I can deal with that. I still have my family. 


H