Aliens, Dinosaurs, Golden Bowerbirds but no Cowboys.

"Duz it look loik there's a ro-de-o here this woikend?" shot back the disturbingly scarlet headed hag at the Dajarra Roadhouse in reply to Sara's enquiry. We all trooped back to the car, and tried to work out our next move. The trouble was, that the plan we had made was entirely predicated on the Dajarra rodeo being on this weekend as per the two telephone conversations we had had with an unknown, but quite probably just as dangerously coiffed woman as the one who had just shooed her only potential customers for the week out of her establishment.

 

And happy to be here

Oli had survived a night in the UFO capital of Australia despite my best attempts to mimic a skinny green alien. Got the skinny bit right, the green was lacking. We pushed through some pretty boring country, stopping beside a deadend river next to a deadend town so that I could watch the Hawks smash the Pies. The barman at the Camoweal pub was good enough to switch the ABC over to the footy, but I watched it by myself out the back. We had arrived in Queensland, rugby league territory.

 

Ivy dropping

From there we pushed up into Lawn Hill having been told by countless people including mum, that it was spectacular. Well, it was, but it was overpriced too, offering less than the National Park down the road for more than twice the coin. Still, poor park management on their part i.e. reliance on the honesty of their guests, meant we stayed five nights, and only paid for three, which made the price about right in our eyes.

 

Lawn Hill was pretty in spite of its three dollar phone charging charge. I managed to get over dinging the van and destroying a rear stabiliser by driving through a dip too quickly. The kids had a ball swinging off ropes and jumping off tree branches into the water. One night they collected over 70 cane toads which we euthanized in our freezer. Needless to say, they weren’t involved in cleansing the freezer of frozen toad juices. The next night they drowned the buggers. It was here that we met Terry the baker from Cairns, and helped him out when his car battery went flat. I’m looking forward to being repaid in doughnuts. It was also here that we learnt about the rodeo in Dajarra.

 

Two unlikely miners

A fun mine tour in Mt Isa and more dinosaur fossils, before we were told we were in Dajarra a week too early. We’d started a loop into nothing, and so pushed on. We pulled up in Middleton, once a Cobb and Co. staging post, now just a pub. A 140 year old pub that is. Two sweat stained, unwashed, bed haired, toothless people wandered around the mess and the questionably heritaged staffordshire terriers that made up the entrance to their pub to greet us. No beer on tap, just cans of VB. Val cremated Sara’s fish and my t-bone, but the kids loved their pies, chips and paddlepops. We ate in what doubles as Val and husband Les’s lounge room over a dirty, fluorescent gingham tablecloth, watched the footy and learnt a lot about camels.

 

Mt Isa sunset (sorry about lack of focus)

We stopped again to learn about dinosaurs in Winton, and met Belinda and Mick. They own the house Jenny and Jim are currently renting in Fremantle. Now that’s a coincidence. A freebie up the highway proved a very popular stop with the kids as they hooned around the town’s tennis courts on a plastic billy cart. Sara and I were happy enough in the community owned Coffield pub across the road. Apparently the original hotel burned down in suspicious circumstances resulting in the locals taking over the liquor licence and setting up in the old school instead of allowing the dodgy publican back in. We met all five of the locals and said we might be back for their races.

 

Middleton Pub

Another massive drive and we were in Undarra national park, home to the world’s longest system of lava tubes. Steve was our guide for the tour and proved to be one of those blokes who has done a little of everything. This surveyor, environmental scientist, sports trainer, publican, farmer, miner, surfer, traveller was brilliant and never shut up as he showed us around. The tubes were breath taking in their cavernous beauty, and all the better because we’d never known what to expect.

 

One roadside stop later and we were in Cairns. The park brake in the Landy had failed again. It’s only dollars I know, but I’m getting very tired of saying “it’s only dollars”. Still, the car needs to be right if we are to get to the tip, so the plastic will be coming out again. Of course, parts need to be ordered in, and the Queen gets an extra birthday in her home state, bless her, so we had some time to fill in.

 

Lava tube

Luckily, Oli had some ideas on where to spot some more birds for what is becoming an impressive life list. Back up into the Atherton Tablelands we drove, Sara’s eyes firmly clenched around every corner (eyes Kevin, I said eyes). Luckily we have a frequent flier pass to Coffee Works in Mareeba which is a fantastic place with the world’s largest collection of coffee machines. That this collection is in Mareeba is not the surprising thing. The surprising thing is that it is so interesting. Well… that and the free coffee and chocolate tasting.

 

Oli and his chauffeather Sara, got up early and went out late spotting heaps of fluttering squawking things. I decided that if you can’t beat them, join them and watched my favourite birds, the Hawks get over the Crows, after beating the Magpies in preparation for the Swans next week. We hiked a bit, swam a bit, saw platypuses and plenty of birds but no tree kangaroos or cassowaries, learnt about rainforests, and then headed off back down the hill via CoffeeWorks to the coast, the FannNoonans, and the home away from home for too many Victorians, Port Douglas.

 

Curtain fig.



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